Blog Layout

Julia Cara • Mar 29, 2022

Using Music to Connect with Older Relatives

This article was written by Julia Cara, and is part of a series provided by upper year Health Sciences students at
McMaster University.

For many of us, holidays and family gatherings have looked very different the past few years. As the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic continues to shape our world, protecting the health of our friends and family has often meant choosing to stay apart during the holiday seasons. While this isolation has affected everyone to varying degrees, its effects have been compounded on older adults, many of whom live alone.

Even when there isn’t a pandemic, older adults experience higher-than-average levels of loneliness, social isolation, depression, and anxiety. For those who live alone – either in a retirement home or long-term care home – visitors are often few and far between. When family and friends do come visit, age-related declines in hearing and memory can make it difficult to follow and engage in conversations.

For my grandmother, who has been living alone for the past fifteen years, these challenges of aging have been amplified by the early stages of dementia. My face remains familiar, though my name is hard to remember, and she often slips back into her mother tongue when we speak. But when I play her a song on the piano, or que up an aria from her favourite opera, she comes alive. It’s almost magical – as if she’s stepped ten years back in time. She’s invigorated. She takes my hands and dances me around the room, and she sings along to her favourite parts remembering every single word.

The granddaughter in me isn’t surprised; music is one of my grandmother’s greatest loves. Verdi, Puccini, Mozart – name an opera and she’s seen it. It makes sense to me that music would be a bridge that connects her to us. However, the student in me is interested in the science behind this phenomenon.

In the past few decades, research into music and its effects on aging has been an exciting area of study. Music has proven to positively impact mood and encourage social connection, but it has also been shown to ameliorate some symptoms of dementia. It stimulates parts of the brain that help compensate for age-related declines in processing speed and memory. Therefore, from a scientific perspective, it makes sense that my grandmother can remember song lyrics and melodies – the music helps her reminisce.

This research has driven the slow but steady emergence of music as an effective, non-pharmacological tool to aid the aging process. While music therapy has traditionally been delivered in formal settings, and by licenced music therapists, recent studies have shown that informal music interventions – such as singing, playing an instrument or listening to a favourite song – can also be effective. Even just listening to music once a week can significantly decrease depression and anxiety and the effects can last for weeks.

Not only does music positively impact mood, decrease loneliness and increase cognitive function, but it’s a form of expression – an integral part of culture, community and connection. If you get the opportunity to see your older relatives sometime soon, whether it be this holiday season or sometime in the new year, consider sharing a few of your favourite songs over a cup of coffee. Maybe you’ll find something magical in the music too.


By Shelley Neal 08 Mar, 2024
I initially trained with MUSIC CARE to work with Seniors in Long Term Care who were experiencing dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease. This is the path I travelled with my mom. My training with Music Care and Room 217 supported capacity building in selecting music that was played on my harp or chosen recorded music. The music centered on the care of the individual and their specific needs. My job was to determine the individual’s specific and select music to address these needs. The music selected helped to build community, support sleep, talk about life experiences, create a background landscape of sound, support connection to decrease isolation and loneliness, as well as coming alongside people dying. My training with Music Care helped me understand how to support people “where they were” physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Through using beat, tempo, melody, and timbre, I could cater the music and desired support required for individuals or small groups. My profession is teaching. I am a special education teacher and use music in my primary teaching as a method for learning, practicing language skills, transmitting information about science studies or math equations, as well as having fun and creating our own songs. My teacher toolkit married exceptionally well with the knowledge and skills provided by the Music Care Certification training. Recently, my work with students has involved individual programming for the medically fragile children and the palliative children. I use music (repeating the chorus several times) to engage and connect with the kiddos. We use music to "talk" about feelings (our communication is through eye gaze, eye blinks, and squeezing hands), and content material. I use music to enjoy our relationship of being together. At times, due to medication for seizures, my little ones can be very sleepy. I increase the tempo, engaging in tapping the beat on her hands and using silly action songs. The giggles and wiggles make it magical. I also use music to tell stories (my students have CVI, cortical vision impairment, so visual perception is difficult). This helps the child to engage in the story arch and adventures. Music is my conduit for reaching out and being with the students. Recently, I had the sacred journey of visiting one of my children in ICU at Sick Kids. I was invited to come to say "goodbye". A dear friend who was an ICU nurse in a different department told me (AKA, insisted) that I bring my harp with me. I wasn't sure if this would be appropriate for the family. However, with the permission of the mom, I bravely packed my harp up and took it to the Unit. It was a beautiful evening of talking with their mom and dad about how special their child was in my life. I played the kiddo's favorite songs and then ended with "The More We Get Together". The little one opened their eyes and stared at me. We hugged, and I left. They passed the next morning. I consider this time to be a sacred gift. Music Care Certification has given me the confidence and toolset to work alongside people and to journey together. It is a time a beautiful, difficult, or sacred time that I have been honoured to participate in.  Thank You
By Bev Foster 10 Jan, 2022
I will never forget the call that came on that cold, crisp January afternoon twenty years ago. I knew it was imminent. I was expecting it and I thought I was ready. But would I ever be ready to say the final farewell to my father?
By Deb Bartlett 11 Sep, 2020
Poodles skirts, saddle shoes, ducktails and fins on your cars. If these words don’t evoke memories and images from the ‘50s maybe this will:
By Deb Bartlett 28 Aug, 2020
Ask people what folk music is, and you'll get a variety of answers. Is it about the music? The lyrics? The song's history? According to Wikipedia's entry on folk music , it's all of those things: music that's performed by custom over a long period of time; that has no known composers; and that has been transmitted orally. It can describe the traditions of the "uncultured classes" and definitely means it's music of the people. And because it's been shared orally, it is music that has a place, or is indicative of a community. In some circles, because folk music tells stories about events and history, it's known as world music. In a dissertation, Rachel Clare Donaldson simply stated "Folk music is what the people sing."
By Deb Bartlett 24 Aug, 2020
As explained in this blog post Not Afraid album, the intent behind the Not Afraid album was not to tell people in hospice palliative care that they needn't be afraid; it was to let them know there are people who love them and are sharing the journey.
By Deb Bartlett 17 Aug, 2020
Room 217 ’s music was designed for use in palliative care. The music is produced at 60 beats per minute (resting heart rate) which has several benefits for the person receiving palliative care. It also aids others in the circle of care. This link will take you to a report that discusses the benefits of music in hospice palliative care .
By Deb Bartlett 11 Aug, 2020
Do you remember where you were the first time you heard them? The Beatles? Had you heard them on the radio? Or was your first experience with The Beatles watching the Jack Paar show, or Ed Sullivan?
By Deb Bartlett 29 Jul, 2020
Room 217’s British Invasion album features 16 tracks of soloists and bands from the U.K. that changed the North American music scene.
By Deb Bartlett 16 Jul, 2020
R-E-S-P-E-C-T. That’s all you need to read and you know the song. In fact, you likely sang it as you read it.
By Deb Bartlett 07 Jul, 2020
Room 217’s Collection 4 Boomer Tracks features the music of the ‘50s, ‘60s and ‘70s – the music many of us grew up listening to. When we think of the types of music that were influential, soul music has to be considered. Soul spawned some of the biggest hits and biggest stars in the music industry, and evolved into even more genres of music.
More Posts
Share by: